free will, evil and God...

The pastoral answer (he mentions in the end) is when tragedy hits us, it hurts.  Sometimes so much so that we feel like we can't go on.  But, know that the Lord is there to help us through it.  He knows how you feel.  He really does, because He himself came down and became human through Jesus. 

Pray and even "yell" if you need to!  God knows your pain.  Let Him in and let Him help.